I hear that planning a wedding is difficult. Not just because there’s so many people that are impossible to please, and not just because it’s a timesuck. It’s also expensive – which makes the already-agonizing task of crafting a guest list all the more difficult. Who, praytell, is worthy of your special day? Generally speaking, it’s close friends, family, and maybe a few of your colleagues, and they receive an invite and respectfully RSVP accordingly. Recently, however, Twitter user @barrybingbongss discovered that there are some people who will text you to decline the invitation – even if they were never invited at all. 

@barrybingbongss shared this unorthodox RSVP with the eager eyes of the bird app, where people are hungry to ridicule the behavior of others. And whooo boy, is this message ripe for ridicule!  

The text message thanks @barrybingbongss for a wedding invite, and goes on to explain that because its author has always been attracted to the betrothed, he would not be able to attend. And then he admits that he hadn’t even received an invitation in the first place. The ‘nice guy’ adds that he wants to have sex with @barrybingbongss, and that this is why «men and girls » can’t enjoy the bond of friendship. 

There’s a lot to unpack there. And fortunately, the people of Twitter were more than happy to take on that work.