The wonderful thing about Twitter for me is that I have very few followers, so every tweet feels like shouting into the void. I can test out all my weirdest, most niche jokes and I don’t have to worry about my mom’s cousin or my former dentist seeing it, like I might on other apps. Of course, the reward is slim, but the risk of flopping is so low that I get a lot of good creative work done there. My small council of followers will either approve or disapprove in a range of 0-9 likes, and I’m happy with that. 

Of course, now that a certain tech billionaire has co-opted the site, driving away droves of users and making the app a generally less hospitable place, it’s even more of a desert. While that might be bad for the site’s long-term viability, it’s perfect for greedy little rats like me shouting my esoteric jokes into the great blue nothing. C’est la vie!