There are many terrifying expects to being a parent, and one of these is managing expectations. Most moms and dads have certain hopes and dreams for their kids from even before they’re born, but a lot of the time they aren’t going to live up to every single one.

It’s true, adaptability and flexibility are two words that always have to be a part of the parenting toolkit. For some, this gets more difficult when children grow up and start to make life decisions of their own that they might not necessarily approve of.

This was the subject of a recent AITA thread, in which a father shared how he disagreed with how his 23-year-old daughter had dealt with adult life so far. Revealing that he had expressed disappointment at her choice to drop out of school as a teen to have her son, Redditors were divided over whether he was entitled to express his opinion. Sometimes these topics need to be approached with a little more tact.