Twitter is a friend to some and an enemy to many. It used to be a hullabaloo of fun and friendship and celebrity gossip, and now it seems to be the epicenter of all annoying internet takes. I was talking to a friend recently about people who you can tell are online vs. people who aren’t, just by speaking to them. Some folks pepper their patois with internet lingo and are always updating people on the latest Twitter discourse. 

Others are blissfully and peacefully offline, and wouldn’t know about the Willy Wonka Experience unless their online friends told them about it. It’s a very modern symbiotic relationship. Kind of like hunting and gathering. The hunters tell of news from far away, while the gatherers stay around the home. So, consider me your hunter, stalking down the latest tweets and memes from the dangerous world of the website formerly known as Twitter. Feast upon it.