I’ve been trying out this new thing where I fast on Mondays. Why? Because Monday is already a hellish reminder that your life revolves around the five day work week—why not make it even more miserable? So now I spend my Mondays depressed and hangry. It’s nice though because Tuesday is always comparatively the best day I’ve ever had. Let me give you some valuable wisdom: being an adult is all about tricking yourself into feeling joy through temporary periods of pain and self-deprivation. It’s all about manufacturing differences so that you can be joyously present in Tuesday and think to yourself «man, I am so glad it’s not Monday anymore!» and then do the whole thing over and over and over and over and over and over again until you finally retire and spend the rest of your days collecting your measly social security benefit. 

Anyway, here’s some funny memes!