If loving my wife is a crime, officer, lock me up! That is the boomer dad version of the newest Twitter meme. It features the caption «me if [banal thing] was illegal» typically accompanied by a picture of Spongebob being handcuffed by the coppers, his face in agony. 

This meme format is fun because it’s just so easy! I have a long list of everyday things that I could not stop doing, even if they were illegal! They include the following…

• Me if drinking at least four servings of Diet Coke per day was illegal
• Me if being an encyclopedia for the Twitter discourse was illegal
• Me if watching the Weird Al Yankovic biopic trailer at least thrice a week was illegal

Wow, aren’t those hypothetical laws fun! Unfortunately, they aren’t particularly relatable. Luckily the people of Twitter have provided a rolodex of relatable iterations of this meme for your urgent consumption.