We covered that Triscuit name-origin story the other day, and the internet has already taken that twitter thread and spawned some much funnier shit. Writer Chuck Wendig‘s spin on the tale is our favorite. It’s quite a bit darker than the Triscuit saga, and involves one of our favorite snacks: Doritos. We have to admit that Wendig had us in the first half of the thread (not gonna lie), but things quickly spiral into deliciously unbelievable territory. And right now, we need all the fantastical and stupid tales we can get.