Greetings, internet users and abusers. It’s Thursday, January 26th, and today feels just like any other. I got up, got out of bed, dragged a comb (brush) across my head. I opened up my ThinkPad and went to Twitter.com like I do every day from Monday to Friday. As per usual, I almost immediately closed the laptop and prayed to the powers that be. Why? Because perusing Twitter for quality content can be so disheartening.
Fortunately, betwixt the rantings and ravings of political lunatics, and the banal sentiments of people who are desperate to go viral, there are gems to be found. Some of them are cute stories about users’ day-to-day lives. Some of the gems come in the form of clever one-liners from Internet comedians. Others are just painfully relatable observations or confessions that make us feel a little less alone. Today I’m sharing all of the above, in the hopes that I can save you from my Twitter-poisoned fate.