She’s not even driving him to his activities: she doesn’t get a vote.

If you’re a stepparent who enters into a pre-existing family dynamic with a bunch of demands that they change things to suit your liking, you can’t act surprised when your stepchild dislikes you. When it comes to matters of the stepchild, it’s essential to observe and learn before you make judgments. You might not understand why your spouse and their child operate the way they do, but after observing them over a couple of months, you start to understand. 

Perhaps they are particular about needing a specific type of ham for their sandwich because it reminds them of their other parent, whom they don’t get to see as often as they’d like. Perhaps they participate in numerous extracurricular activities because, without them, they would become idle and listless. Whatever the case may be, a parent will nearly always know their child better than their stepparent, so it’s essential to take the lead of your husband or wife instead of deciding what is best for a child you don’t know well. It’s always better to err on the side of caution with matters like these.