I’ve reached a new concept: Eventual Extroversion

Why do we have to categorise our personalities so much? Can’t we be stable in some form of instability? Like knowing that once in a while we step out of our comfort zone and become extroverted for an entire weekend and then go back to normal? Is that not possible? Do we have to behave the same way always? Can’t variations be part of our identity? Does that defy the concept of identity, or do we have an extremely rigid concept of what identity really is?

I’m not necessarily an introvert, but I’m definitely not an extrovert who has been repressing her socializing instincts. My desire to socialize comes in waves, and I love coming back home after a particularly sociable weekend and enjoying a full 4 days of not going out whatsoever.

I can’t miss my own company if I don’t go out, and vice versa; I can’t miss anyone if I don’t stay home for a few days.

I like staying home during the week, enjoying my time alone and planning for the weekend, and after an agitated weekend, there is nothing better than coming home and realizing how quiet and peaceful it is. I don’t mean to go out every weekend; I’m just saying this for weekends that I do.

I like the concept of eventual extroversion because it allows me to talk about the fact that it’s not that those of us who conform to that group have social anxiety or are antisocial; maybe we just like to alternate between going out and staying home.

Liking to go out once in a while is similar to loving chocolate cake; I can assure you’d hate it if you had to eat it for every meal. Why can’t we treat extroversion the same way? Do we really have to act the same every day? I know my energy fluctuates, and my inclinations fluctuate with her. I like respecting that.

I just want to say neither version is more authentic than the other; that’s why I came up with the concept in the first place. My appreciation for solitude grows exponentially every time I go out, and I like the feeling.

Every time I go back to my confinement, I rediscover my solitary activities with more excitement, and sometimes I even come up with new ones; for example, the last time I went out, I decided I wanted to create a LIVING GEOPOLITICAL WORLD MAP, because I overheard some people talking about some events I hadn’t heard of, and it seemed like a fun way to keep up to date with the news, lol.

Can you imagine? A physical map with coloured pins and Post-its that represent the different governments and situations happening, a map you can update every time something new happens.

It might sound boring and geeky to you, but to me, it sounds like a wonderful game that I can play all by myself! And it reinvents itself! Bliss.