Some people bother themselves with questions about the universe, others dedicate their lives to changing the world, and then there are those, like today’s momma drama queen, whose entire existence appears to hinge on one sacred, self-centered goal, in the case of this entitled piece of work–getting selected for the PTA board. While the rest of us wrestle with mortality or climate change, she’s busy conducting an inner monologue about how her worth is measured in laminated name tags. This woman isn’t disappointed, she’s broken. 

Her logic is simple: being overlooked by a bunch of chatty volunteers is a cosmic injustice worse than a forgotten Mother’s Day. The news that someone else gets the board seat triggers a public scene full of loud protests and not-so-subtle jabs about unfairness and qualifications.