As Stephen Sondheim once penned, «It’s the little things you do together that make perfect relationships. The hobbies you pursue together, savings you accrue together, looks you misconstrue together, that make marriage a joy.» Life is made up of the little things. Especially in the course of a relationship, the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. But its parts matter nonetheless. If you’re constantly disconnecting from the small gestures you do for each other, then it’s hard to build a healthy relationship. This especially goes for acts of service. It is one of the five love languages, after all. If you’re missing the mark on those gestures, then you might miss the mark on the whole affair. 

Of course, this is a delicate balance. Most people don’t want a relationship built on a power imbalance, where one is constantly taking care of another and it doesn’t go the other way around.