If your parents moved 10 hours away from you, would you make an effort to visit them, or would you expect them to come to you?

Many people have big plans for their retirement. They save money for luxurious vacations, buy a summer house somewhere near the beach, and take up a hobby they always wanted to try. And after decades of working tirelessly, they truly deserve it. They should enjoy the time they have left doing the things that make them most happy.

For many retired folks, the things that make them most happy revolve around spending time with their family. Visiting their kids, taking their grandchildren on fun adventures, that is what they look forward to most in their retirement. So they visit every chance they get, and babysit for free, and fund family vacations, all to spend more time with the people they love.

The problem with the retired dad below is that he wants to spend time with his family, yet he has no problem moving 10 hours away from them. So the «spending time together» plan cannot really happen if they are so far away from each other all the time.

You can claim that since he’s retired, he can make the trip to his daughter and her family whenever he wants, and you would be correct, except that he doesn’t want to. He wants her to come to him. He doesn’t care that she has a job, three cats, and a 1.5-year-old baby; he expects her to pack everything up and come visit him when he demands.

She, on the other hand, knows he is being unreasonable. He is the one who moved, who’s retired and doesn’t have a job. So if he wants to see his family, he needs to come to them. The only question is – is he willing to do that?