Some people treat divorce like a subscription service where they assume continued access to their ex-partner’s wallet long after canceling the relationship contract, apparently operating under the delusion that adding more children to their household automatically expands their ex’s financial obligations to include the entire blended family roster.

This particular brand of post-divorce entrepreneurship follows a predictable business model: accumulate children from multiple partners, struggle with basic arithmetic regarding income versus expenses, then approach the most financially stable ex-spouse with requests disguised as moral imperatives.