We don’t have the answers to many of life’s questions, but we have pretty much figured out «what would happen if you wiped the brain of a human being and watched their every waking thought run riot?». The reason for this is that children exist.

As everyone who’s spent a long time around kids can attest, they are deeply strange little people. Just when you think that you’ve got one figured out, they go through some kind of phase or pivotal personality development that leaves you blindsided.

This is before you even get to the things that end up coming out of their mouths. While they might not always have the greatest grasp of language or logic, their creativity and ability to freak out the average adult is unparalleled. 

This has been underlined by a thread started by @LilahSturges, who relayed a story of her daughter insisting she had been married to a man who got «lost at sea». That may sound strange, but it’s nothing compared to some of the tales of kids gone awry that other people replied with. If seemingly supernatural encounters are not your bag, it’s probably best to avoid the whole ‘starting a family’ thing.