I find that there are few things more humbling than spending a small amount of time on a dating app. You try to go into the whole thing being confident about yourself — you might be no match for the catfishes and the Instagram models, but the pictures on your profile are flattering. You can hold down a decent enough conversation with a stranger, and you’ve thought out any prompts or bios so that they’re witty yet approachable. That should warrant at least a couple of decent matches, right?

Sike! Turns out the only people that seem to be interested have the kind of personality that leaves you drier than the Sahara, and that’s before we even get into their looks. Perhaps those singletons that complain about all the good ones being snatched up really weren’t wrong. It doesn’t help that nobody acts like they know how to conduct themselves with online dating. The examples below only prove this.