If you’ve had the same tradition for a few years, and elements change, it’s important to be prepared for those changes to avoid any ‘awkwardness’ or confrontation. This grad student has been helping her bestie’s family prep their Thanksgiving dinner for the last few years. Normally, taking responsibility for cooking a dish or two helps with prep time and efficiency. A pretty kind and generous gesture…or so she’d say!

But this year things just felt different, until she realized that her friend’s parents had expected her to cover the costs of those dishes, unlike previous years. She felt uncomfortable for being left out of the «potluck» loop, but thought that her $40 fancy chocolate box should compensate for the guilt of not contributing towards groceries…So she let it go…until her friend’s mother made a direct point to aggressively address the issue with her… Making her friend’s home the last place she wanted to spend Thanksgiving…because it now represented anything but ‘Thanks.’